You really have to Wonder…

…what people were really trying to find.

I love looking at my blog’s statistics page. Sure, it’s fun to see what posts draw the most attention, and how many views my posts have had in a particular day. But the best part of it for me is to see what search terms brought curious viewers. When people type phrases or words into a search engine, they sometimes get my blog posts as a result. And then they click on my blog, and my blog’s stats note their original search terms. I have a complete list (8 pages long) of search terms from the past year and then some, and I have been wanting to share some of the most hilarious search terms I’ve seen on my stats. So, without further ado, here is the countdown of best search terms* from the past year or so, and what posts they were linked to:

10. housework sweatpants (this post)

Okay, I can see how this totally relates to me. And if you know me, you definitely know that I do all housework in sweatpants. In fact, if I am home, it is safe to assume that I am wearing sweatpants. But really, did someone actually search for, like, sweatpants made specifically for housework?!

9. oy with the poodles already (this post)

Yes, this is the title of one of my posts. So it makes sense that it would come up in a search engine. It’s also a line from Gilmore Girls. Apparently the person who searched for it wasn’t aware from the rest of the dialogue that it’s a totally made-up phrase from the show and it has absolutely no particular meaning. And here’s the video to prove it:

Oy, with the Poodles Already!

8. irish valentine fern (this post)

Someone interested in horticulture! Unfortunately we have never had a fern in our house… and definitely not one given at Valentine’s Day. But HEY! Now I know what Jonathan’s getting next February! Thanks, search engine user, for such a great idea!

7. irish fold cat (this post)

Google these. They actually don’t really exist. Their real name is “Scottish Fold Cats.” They are they ugliest cats I have ever seen. Kind of like a mix between a bush baby and gremlin, with a little tiger cub thrown in just for whiskers.

6. summer bursta 2012 e e e a a a (this post)

Apparently if you drop one of the a’s, you’ll be able to find…something. I am trying to figure out exactly what it is. The original searcher misspelled tremendously. And some of the websites that come up with that search term are in Arabic. So I’m not sure what it is!

5. soap smell in my house (this post) 

Wish I had this problem.

4. yoo ah in purple chair (this post)

??????? A lot of what comes up when I conduct my own search for this is fan fiction. Yipe.

3. 9 month old baby shouts like a cow muuuh (can’t find the post!)

Yes, I have had this. But I never blogged about it! In fact, my child was well past 9 months old when we started this here bloggie blog. And by the way, can you imagine needing to actually search this term? That 9-month-old must have been driving his/her parent(s) crazy!

2. whew wee (this post)

I do feel that way frequently! This pregnancy better end SOOOOOOOON!

1. tingle in my foot when i wee (this post)

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I can only imagine they got linked to this post. I’m sure that’s not what they were looking for. For the record, I have never felt a tingle in my foot when I relieve myself. That would be quite interesting. I will tell you that my jaw hurts sometimes if I hold it long enough. But I think that’s more of a tension issue than an actual physiological connection between the two. 🙂

Okay, that wraps up Episode 1 of “You really have to Wonder what people were really trying to find!”

*I actually have quite a few more from the past year. I just didn’t want to give them all away at once… because they’re too funny NOT to share! 

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1 Comment

  1. Kristy said,

    July 18, 2012 at 3:27 pm

    You got me Googling. Those Scottish Fold Cats are the type they usually have on commercials and whatnot speaking human-speak. Freaky.

    Ah, that anonymous tingle-in-the-foot person. They phrased that more delicately than I would have. How G-rated of them.


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